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  • File:1991.Ferret2.jpg
    Animals love me. This ferret came up to me, and adopted me.
    (711 × 397 (295 KB)) - 00:03, 9 February 2019
  • File:1991.Ferret.jpg
    Animals love me. This ferret came up to me, and adopted me as it's owner
    (711 × 501 (342 KB)) - 23:59, 8 February 2019
  • File:KissForWhiskey.jpg
    Me: thanks for all you do for me *leans in for a kiss*.<br />Liquor Store Clerk: can you just pay for the wh
    (800 × 800 (114 KB)) - 12:35, 15 October 2019
  • File:KonaAndMe.jpg
    ...e with a surcharge, but they honored the Costco discount. (They under-paid me for the trade-in, but it was convenient).
    (960 × 720 (85 KB)) - 23:25, 27 April 2019
  • File:PlaysShootMeNow.jpg
    Abe Lincoln: Fuckin' wife dragging me to another stupid play. Someone shoot me now.<br />
    (720 × 687 (30 KB)) - 13:22, 23 October 2019
  • File:UmbrellaConvo.JPG
    ...nting to learn about their culture. Then the Bartender cut me off and told me they were patio umbrellas.
    (640 × 640 (89 KB)) - 19:08, 11 October 2019
  • File:DirtyLaundryTalks.jpg
    Washer: I like it dirty, I want you inside me. <br /> Dirty Laundry: OMG, you're gonna make me wet.
    (537 × 537 (43 KB)) - 18:47, 7 January 2020
  • File:OldCowJoke.jpg
    ...He said, they fed me the best food, got me drunk, the daughter slept with me, and all I did is tell them I'm Nancy Pelosi's chauffeur, and I just killed
    (937 × 960 (100 KB)) - 12:12, 23 January 2020
  • File:BernieFarieTales.jpg
    ...Fairy Tales read to kids... tell me again how the rich guy is going to buy me a free X-Box and stuff...
    (960 × 807 (141 KB)) - 18:33, 19 August 2019
  • File:BitcoinPriceOfCollege.jpg
    Me: I can't believe it increased by 1500%<br /> Me: I was talking about college tuition since 1980!
    (768 × 825 (56 KB)) - 11:21, 28 August 2019
  • File:TurnAroundBrightEyes.jpg
    Me: Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never comin' round Me: Every now and... [BZZT!] {Gets Tazed!}
    (720 × 618 (28 KB)) - 18:28, 23 August 2019
  • File:StopOppressingMe.jpg
    Stop oppressing me!
    (320 × 301 (29 KB)) - 21:29, 13 August 2019
  • File:PullOut2.jpg
    Did you nut inside me? Why do you ask?
    (773 × 782 (102 KB)) - 13:53, 17 August 2019
  • File:FB-DontLeave.jpg
    Please don't leave me.
    (302 × 362 (15 KB)) - 23:05, 5 August 2019
  • File:Quill.jpg
    Send me your complaints with quill and ink.
    (320 × 414 (31 KB)) - 00:05, 12 August 2019
  • File:StrawFlag.jpg
    Don't sip on me.
    (960 × 652 (34 KB)) - 13:10, 24 September 2019
  • File:TrustMeImSmart.jpeg
    Trust me, I'm smart.
    (600 × 511 (44 KB)) - 09:59, 23 August 2019
  • File:ThisStatueOffendsMe.jpg
    This statue offends me, please remove it.
    (293 × 440 (35 KB)) - 10:45, 25 August 2019
  • File:WellFedTat.jpg
    Well Fed: put food in me.
    (494 × 250 (15 KB)) - 13:54, 4 November 2019
  • File:Tits.jpg
    I have tits, now give me free stuff!
    (180 × 180 (16 KB)) - 21:31, 13 August 2019

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